Hi kidlets, it's been a while, but I'm back. I know you couldn't take my absence. But they say absence makes the heart grow fonder. Is it true? Have you missed my innane posts and pointless ramblings? Have you forgiven my coarse and brash comments regarding sex and our species and our undoing? Well, everything is gonna be okay now, I promise. I went to the Zoo with my son George and his aunt Julie recently and we watched cool otters and sealions swimming around, and the huge spiders and snakes and aligators, plus we also caught the elephants fucking. My sister thought the elephant had a fifth leg and as he backed the female elephant into the corner and stradled her from behind, I knew I was getting my monies worth. I tried to get my sister to take a picture of me and George in front of this exciting natural drama, but she wouldn't acquiesce.



After Julie and I took George home, guess what? Reubens Accomplice came to town! That's right, I got to see Ryan 'ironlemon' Kennedy play with his mates live in Houston! It was wonderful and I'm not just saying this, all of the bands that he was touring with were great! My sister came to the show too and we all had a blast. Ryan, Chris, and John crashed on my floor and the last thing I remember was Ryan and I watching old promotional videos for early eighties Atari 2600 Activision cartridges. Good times, good times.



My life has been a literal rollercoaster of sorts latley I can't even keep track, I think I have had five different jobs in the past two months. One word that does not come to mind when one thinks of Larry Hicks should ever be stable. Unless your talking about horses, because Will Ferrell and I love horses.

I am a liar. And as George Washington taught me, you cannot tell a lie. But I am stable in one aspect, and that is in writing songs. I will not stop! There are three new songs for your listening pleasure in the music section. Yee-haw!

-----> IMPORTAINT NOTE <----- To fully enjoy the links on this site go now and bookmark: bugmenot.com
Very useful while getting information from a variety of sources in the quickest and most unobtrusive way. If bugmenot is down, it's probably because of a situation like this. Keep trying, hopefully it will be back up in a day or so.

Now if anyone out there has been contemplating moving to Texas, I just have to say right now- "do not move to Texas!". It is a vipers nest of crazymotherfuckers as our new expose will attest to. And so I now bring you an Aquanaut Drinks Coffee exclusive, and the first in a new ongoing series entitled:

'Texas Sucks Ass And Is Full Of Crazy People'.

1. Texas' Crazy Cops
2. Texas' Crazy Old Ladies With Guns
3. Texas' Crazy Guy With Molotov Cocktail

Okay, let's just get this out of the way, it's time for our Politics section! I know, I know. I have been pushing politics way too hard in my previous posts. So now we have a special section where I will go off about my opinions and then shut the fuck up and get on with the blog. :)
I knew you'd like that.
Okay, first . . .



Sure, I want John Kerry to win. It's as simple as that. Him being the bass player in The Electras just sweetens the deal. Go John!

If China decides now's the time to reign again in Taiwan, we are stretched far too thin from this Iraq bullshit to respond with any strength, and then, 4ll ur ch34P r|_||_|nning sho3s r b3l0ng 2us.

If George W. Bush is good at one thing, it's keeping America scared.



Boy, I really enjoy what George Soros is saying and I have submitted questions to his new blog. Now Republicans don't like what Soros has to say like we need to legalize drugs, we need to get rid of our idiot president and enlightening viewpoints like that. Did anyone notice that in the debates on Tuesday, in answering a question about his involvement with Halliburton, Cheney meant to direct people to FactCheck.org, a nonpartisan site run by the University of Pennsylvania's Annenberg Public Policy Center. He urged people watching the debate to go to the site for facts countering Edwards' statements about the corporation Cheney used to run.

But Cheney cited FactCheck.com, a for-profit advertising site based in the Cayman Islands.

The company decided to redirect traffic to the Soros site after it became inundated with hits -- about 100 a second after the debate, John Berryhill, a Philadelphia lawyer for FactCheck.com, said Wednesday.



Do yourself a favor and read about the strange saga of BCCI.

Wow, Britain's ambassador to Italy and I agree, Bush is al Qaeda's best recruiting sergeant.

The poetry of Saparmurat Niyazov.

Is the improvised explosive device hidden under the dead goat? Check out the scanned lo-res excerpts at the bottom of the article for the scariest parts.


A strange game, the only way to win is not to play.

So there are new songs for you all and I hope all your endeavors are going well. Go get your groove on with these other fine sites:
These secretive painters are writing excellent songs about their lives, as we speak! Go. Now. Listen. Be happy!
I found a great link for all Meat Puppets fans. I had tapes of bootlegged Meat Puppets shows that I taped from Long Wongs when I was sixteen. These were stolen, along with over forty irreplaceable ADC tapes, along with my car, while I was delivering pizza in Arizona in 1998. Incidentally, I had over $400 dollars, CASH, in the glove compartment.
:P
Hi.
I'm.
Mr.
Smart.
Otherwise, I would have totally uploaded my tapes of these shows to this supurb site. ***sigh*** To nobodies suprise, the car turned up stripped of all worth in Mexico.



Alright, for your amusement, our game of the week, belatedly three-weeks old: Tunnels And Trolls! I really liked this game when I was a kid and strangley enough, one of the co-designers of this excellent role playing game came and spoke to me and Ryan's freshman English class in high school! The guy, I believe it was Alan Pavlish, had also worked on the classic computer RPG Wasteland, and we were thrilled to say the least.

This exciting new 'green' technology sounds fantastic!

Excellent video of opening a Kryptonite bike lock with a ballpoint pen.

Incredible inventions are appearing daily, like this antenna for light!

A bold new direction in fraud, man rents out property he dosen't own. Classic.

In case you were totally confused as to weather or not to marry your sweetheart, Gene Simmons is here for you with his interesting perspective. It's not the marriage that gets you Gene, it's the divorce, and my guess is by now you've been through a few.

You worked hard today, take your shoes off, make yourself a drink, sit down, and spend some quality time with Bannana Phone.

Talk to you soon!